Audrey Holst, How to Balance Perfectionism and Excellent Action – InnovaBuzz 473

Audrey Holst, Fortitude & Flow

In this episode, I’m really excited to have as my guest, Audrey Holst from Fortitude and Flow. Audrey helps people reform their perfectionism so they can reclaim their agency and put their full energy into what really matters. Her work uses a combination of mindfulness and neuroscience tools and combines over a decade of experience teaching yoga with deep knowledge of the nervous system and extensive training and work as a Certified Professional Coach. Through her Fortitude & Flow Process, Audrey guides individuals and groups through a holistic experience to shift the way they approach themselves and the things that matter to them – for good.

In our discussion, Audrey talked to me about:

• Common signs that perfectionism is holding us back
• How to balance perfectionism and excellent action
• Being aware of your whole body to get into a flow

Michael Roderick in episode 328 and Jason Van Orden in episode 275 introduced us to Audrey.

Listen to the podcast to find out more.

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Show Notes from this episode with Audrey Holst of Fortitude & Flow

Key points and takeaways from this episode include:

• We are influencing others through our nervous system all the time.

• The 5 Perfectionist Archetypes:
  1. Covert Perfectionists – people who sometimes will not do things because of fear or knowing somebody is going to do it better.
  2. Hero Perfectionists – people that are always doing things for everybody. 
  3. Brake and Gas Perfectionists – people that have one foot on the brake and the other on the gas. They want to do something but they’re not doing it.
  4. Rigid Perfectionists – everything has to run by them so that it can be perfect.
  5. Optics Perfectionists – people that are really concerned about communication. They want their words to be completely right.

• Perfectionism is about amplifying our strengths and adopting an experimental mindset instead of giving up when you don’t get it right on the first try.
• It is in falling down and getting back up again that we start to learn. It is in that process that things start to change.
• Change starts from small, doable, and experimental actions.
• Perfectionism is a survival mechanism. We don’t just choose it.
• Start by building some observational noticing skills so that you can start to see things as they kick in and create an opportunity to make conscious choices on how to handle them.
• We always have a choice. We can choose to push things for excellence or choose to feel that things have to be a certain way so we can feel better.
• Not everything needs to be fixed. Sometimes, nothing needs to be done.
• Start noticing what it’s like to be YOU in your day or in this moment – how is your breathing? How’s the quality of the thoughts in your mind?
• Perfectionism is a mind thing, and it’s not enough to simply address challenges through your mind. You also need to connect with all the sensations and feelings of anxiety in your body. Once you address those, the thoughts will take care of themselves.
• We are physical creatures in a physical planet. It’s important to also pay attention to our physical body on this physical plane, as well as the information it is constantly feeding us. 
• The mind always needs something to focus on. Knowing how to change your attention and focus on things that are more important is a vital skill. 

• The Fortitude & Flow Process:
  1. Fortitude – noticing and discernment, having an objective awareness of something and then starting to discern
  2. Flow – action and integration, making small doable experimental actions and integrating it – was it successful?

• Perfectionism is prescriptive and we are not prescriptive.
• Technology gives us the ability to customise how we show up. There are different ways and tools that are available to us to help us communicate and connect with people in a way that feels most authentic to us, and ultimately, will be received by others as authentically as possible. 
• Just because you’re uncomfortable, doesn’t mean there’s something wrong. Sometimes things are just uncomfortable because you haven’t done them before.

The Buzz – Our Innovation Round

Here are Audrey’s answers to the questions of our innovation round. Listen to the conversation to get the full scoop.

1. #1 thing to be more innovative – Get out in nature.
2. Best thing for new ideas – Have conversations with people. 
3. Favourite tool for innovation –  When Things Fall Apart by Pema Chödrön
4. Keep project/client on track –  Know where they’re going. 
5. Differentiate – Just show up as you and trust that people will resonate with you because of who you are and not who you are trying to be.

To Be a Leader

Perfectionism is not a terrible thing. It’s a natural part of a lot of our experiences. Learn how to work with it and make it work for you to produce excellence in your life as opposed to letting it drag you down and create fear. It’s possible to achieve and do the things you want to do and enjoy in life with perfectionism.

Reach Out

You can reach out and thank Audrey through her website.

Suggested Guest

Audrey suggested we have a conversation with Heather Thorkelson, author of No Plan B, and Henry Lopez of The How of Business. So Heather and Henry, keep an eye on your inboxes for an invitation from us to the InnovaBuzz Podcast, courtesy of Audrey Holst.

Links

• Website – Fortitude & Flow
• LinkedIn
• Facebook
• Instagram

Click here to get your copy of The Perfectionist Archetypes guide.

Book

• You’re Not Perfect — And Here’s How to Deal With That

Cool Things About Audrey

• She’s a certified Bikram Yoga instructor.
• She graduated from the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC) in 2014.
• She leads a virtual membership collective called Renew, which prioritizes healing, rest, self-care, and community.

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